STRAWBERRY KIWI CHAPTER THREE

HOLD UP 10:27AM EASTERN TIME

SUNDAY FEBRUARY 10TH, 2019

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KEVI, SO, WHAT AN 18TH BIRTHDAY PRESENT FOR YOU. HAHA-HAHA-HAHA SO, YEA, YA, YA, YA, CHAPTER THREE. WHAT DID I SAY CHAPTER THREE WAS GOING TO BE ABOUT?  I KNOW I SAID SOME SLICK SH LIKE AND IT’S NOT EVEN WRITTEN YET. NOW WHAT WAS IT? GIVE ME A SECOND. (30SECOND PAUSE) WHATEVER (MULTIPLIED 4TIMES). LAUGHS. WHATEVER I SAID CHAPTER THREE WAS GOING TO BE ABOUT IT’S PROBABLY NOT GOING TO BE ABOUT THAT BC I CAN’T REMEMBER WHAT I SAID. I ONLY REMEMBER I SAID SOME SLICK ** AND I DON’T KNOW ANYMORE BUT, SO WITH THAT DONE, THAT WAS DEEP, JUST TELLING THAT STORY. JUST UH, JUST UH JUST THREW ME IN A DITCH, IT WAS LIKE OH IT WAS JUST A DITCH FOR 15MINUTES MAN.

    I WAS LIKE DAM I WAS SITTING DOWN AND EVERYTHING, I HAD TO SIT DOWN, NOW I JUST NEED LIKE A DRINK JUST LIKE OH MAN YOU KNOW LIKE LOGICALLY, DOES THAT MAKE ANY SENSE? YOU KNOW LIKE, YOU’RE GOING TO HOP IN THE WATER WITH THEM NOW? OH, LIKE WOULD THE CEO HOP IN THE WATER WITH THEM? THAT’S THE QUESTION THE TRAINERS NEVER ASKED. YOU KNOW? ARE YOU GOING TO GET IN THERE WITH US? 

YOU KNOW? SO UM, YOU GET THAT CREDIT CARD, AND YOU SWIPE IT FOR EVERYTHING. EVERYTHING? EVERYTHING! I JUST HAD TO GO INTO A RABBIT HOLE REAL QUICK. I JUST HAD TO GO INTO TWO RABBIT HOLES BEFORE I FINISH THIS ONE UP. UM, EVERY CHAPTER WAS A RABBIT HOLE. YOU WANT TO TAKE THAT CREDIT CARD AND SWIPE IT FOR EVERYTHING. YOU’VE GOT YOUR CASH RESERVE, YOU’LL HAVE IT  IT’S THERE YOU’LL HAVE IT ON YOU SOMEWHERE.      

NOW YOUR CASH RESERVE FOR THAT SO BOOM. YOU UM, AFTER THAT YOU'RE GOING TO WANT TO UH MAYBE UH, YOU’RE GONNA WANNA PAY THAT CREDIT CARD BILL OFF. YOU’RE GOING TO WANT TO PAY THE MINIMUM BALANCE BC THE UH MAIN THING ABOUT CREDIT, THEY WANT TO, THEY BEING THE COMPANIES ISSUING THE CREDIT LINE ITSELF, THE CREDIT LINE COMPANY, THEY WANT TO UM, KNOW THAT YOU CAN MAINTAIN THE MINIMUM BALANCE. RIGHT? THAT’S THE OBJECTIVE OK? CAN YOU MAINTAIN THE MINIMUM BALANCE RIGHT? NOW, THE ANSWER SHOULD BE YES, THREE TIMES AND HERE’S WHY. UM, I WAS ON A CONFERENCE CALL WITH UH ONE CREDIT COACH BACK WHEN I WAS 19 AND I WAS WORKING WITH THE CREDIT COACH I WAS LIKE ACTUALLY WORKING FOR HER. SHE WAS GIVING ME HER ASSIGNMENTS, IT WAS WEIRD, THAT WAS A LOT FOR LIKE A 19YR (MAY HAVE BEEN 18) OLD OMGOODNESS BUT WHEN I STOP AND THINK ABOUT IT LIKE DAM THAT WAS LIKE THE ENTRY WAY RIGHT THERE INTO LIKE THE PERFECT JOB. YOU KNOW WHAT I’M SAYING? LIKE DAM, SH, I DIDN’T FULLY KNOW WHAT I HAD RIGHT THERE OH, FK, FK, ANYWAY, UH. I WAS LIKE HER VIRTUAL ASSISTANT, WHAT? ANYWAY. MAKES ME SHIVER. UM, OK.

YOU PAY THE CREDIT CARD MINIMUM BALANCE, THREE TIMES, IN A MONTH. YOU PAY IT ONCE PER WEEK, FOR THREE WEEKS, OUT OF THE FOUR WEEKS, OF THE MONTH . AFTER THAT, IN THEORY, THEY, THEM BEING THE CREDIT CARD COMPANIES, ARE GOING TO HAVE TO, RAISE UP YOUR SCORE. SO, DO THAT FOR 365 DAYS, 12 MONTHS, 4 SEASONS, AND UM, SEE THE INCREASE IN IT AND THEN YOU;LL KNOW THE PERCENTAGE RATE IT INCREASES PER YEAR OF DOING THAT SO AND YOU CAN BREAK IT DOWN TO MONTHS OR SEASONS AND STUFF SO, UM BOOM. THAT’S NUMBER ONE, BC WHY? WHY? I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE THINKING. 

YOU’RE THINKING WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? CHAD? WHY CHAD? WHY? OH, THEY LOVE TO ASK ME THAT QUESTION. WHY CHAD? WHY? NOT BECAUSE THEY REALLY WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWER, THEY JUST WANT TO BATTLE. OH, YOU WANT TO BATTLE NX? NXZ LOVE TO TALK ABOUT MONEY TO ME. I SAID, NXZ LOVE TO TALK ABOUT MONEY TO ME. YET AND STILL, THESE NXZ OUT HERE THEY WERE NEVER TALKING TO ME ABOUT HOW MONEY WORKS. THEREFORE, THESE NXZ WERE NEVER TALKING TO ME ABOUT HOW TO GET MONEY. YOU DON’T EVEN HAVE TO HAVE MONEY TO KNOW HOW TO GET MONEY OR HOW MONEY WORKS. CONVERSELY, IF YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MONEY WORKS, THEN THERE ARE ONLY TWO WAYS YOU KNOW HOW TO GET MONEY.  

WHAT ARE THE TWO WAYS OF HOW TO GET MONEY CHAD? WHAT ARE THE TWO WAYS? SO, THE TWO WAYS ON HOW TO GET MONEY, IF YOU DON’T KNOW HOW MONEY WORKS THEN, HMM, MPH-MPH-MPH  UM MPH-MPH-MPH-MPH-MPH, UM, EITHER CRIME, OR WORKING FOR THE WHITE MAN. NOW, CRIME IS A GOOD UM SEGUE FOR THIS, CRIME, CRIME, CRIME. CRIME IS THE MIDDLE WORD OF THE EMANCIPATION PROCLAMATION. 

    DID YOU KNOW? HEY. HEY. HEY. HEY. HAYE.  DID YOU KNOW, DID YOU KNOW, THE EMANCIPATION, PROCLAMATION, HAS A MIDDLE NAME? BY A MIDDLE NAME I MEAN CLAUSE. THE MIDDLE NAME IS NOT “CLAUSE” THE MIDDLE NAME, IS THE “CLAUSE”. IT’S A WORD PROCLAMATION IMPLIES. OK, WE’RE GOING TO DO THIS WITH GOOGLE, ’CAUSE WHITE PEOPLE MADE GOOGLE. SO, (SNIFFLE) HMM, DEFINE EMANCIPATION.

    EMANCIPATION, IT’S A NOUN. SYNONYMS, FREEING, LIBERATION, LIBERATING, SETTING FREE, RELEASE, RELEASING, LETTING LOOSE, OR OUT, SETTING LOOSE OR FREE, DISCHARGE, UNCHAINING, UNFETTERING, UNYOKING, UNTYING, UNSHACKLING, UNCAGING, UNBRIDLING, FREEDOM, LIBERTY. RARE, DISENTHRALLMENT, THE EMANCIPATION OF THE SERFS. SURF YOUR ASS TO SOME FUCKING MORALS. THE FREEING OF SOMEONE FROM SLAVERY, 

    NOW THAT’S WHAT IT SAID THAT IS RIGHT? EMANCIPATED, THAT WAS A PRETTY HONEST TRANSLATION, THAT’S WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE RIGHT? SEEMS LIKE, NONE OF US OUT THERE, WOULD HAVE TOO MUCH, YOU KNOW UM, CONFUSION OVER THAT ONE. SEEMS LIKE THAT ONE FITS SO, LET’S TYPE IN THAT OTHER WORD, PROCLAMATION.

    HMM. HMM. OH MY GOODNESS, OK. PROCLAMATION, IT’S A NOUN, A PUBLIC OR OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENT, ESPECIALLY ONE DEALING WITH A MATTER OF GREAT IMPORTANCE. EISENHOWER SIGNED A PROCLAMATION ADMITTING ALASKA TO THE UNION. SYNONYMS, DECREE, ORDER, EDICT, RULE, ANNOUNCEMENT, STATEMENT, PRONOUNCEMENT, DECLARATION, ADVERTISEMENT, BLAZONING.

    THAT LAST ONE, THE CLEAR DECLARATION OF SOMETHING. I RECORDED READING THE FULL TEXT BUT I’M NOT RETYPING IT. IT’S NOT WANTED IN THE PAGE COUNT EITHER. THE SEVEN MINUTE AUDIO EXISTS. GOOGLE THE FULL TEXT. 

“LET’S GET THIS BREAD BOYS”; CHAPTER FOUR: STRAWBERRY KIWI THE PREQUEL

SUNDAY FEBRUARY 10TH, 2019